Secrets, Future Plans, and Blah-de-Blah

I’ll Let You In Something; or “Hell If I Know What I’m Doing!”

So I have to be honest. It’s been just a few short days since I came back from a mini-break in Las Vegas, and I am more homesick than a crackpot in a bull shop (think about it for a minute). I’m currently weighing my options, and figuring out whether or not to stay for one more year in Korea or come home. Financially, the best decision is to stay. But I want to get home…and I don’t mean in any particular way Las Vegas, though it is my default location. Mom is there; my friends are there; happy hour at BJ’s is there. If I had to decide right now, I’d bite the bullet and take the risk: I’d come back and face a horrid economy, complete with a tepid (at best) job market.

This raises the question of “What next?”, which staying in Korea for another year allows me to delay. But that’s not a particularly good situation, as I need to figure this one out in relatively short order regardless of what my ultimate decision is. If my past experience in just about anything has shown anything, however, it’s that I do rise to the challenge at the last minute. I’ve got numerous term papers and even job offerings to prove that one conclusively. So while I don’t know exactly what my course is, I’d bank on me getting there.

Oh – the crackpot in a bull shop analogy had no meaning or purpose. So if you thought about it longer than 30 seconds, sorry Kitty; let me know, and next time we’re together I’ll buy you a lager.

Getting Back Home

Speaking of that trip to Las Vegas, if I didn’t get to see you on this last outing please do not be pissed at me. I did not get to see a lot of people on this trip, and everyone that I saw (save for mom and family) I saw once. That being said, it was glorious to be back. Las Vegas and Henderson will always hold a place in my heart, if for no other reason than that I grew up here. I made some great friends in Southern Nevada, and had some out of this world mentors and teachers. I’ll always be grateful for that.

Closed

Given that the main title for today’s posting is “Secrets”, I might as well let you in on a pretty big one: I appear to have an inability to open up to anyone beyond friendship. Now don’t get me wrong, friendships are extremely crucial and important in my life; I’d be screwed beyond measurable doubt without them. And those closest to me have as good of an understanding of who I am as I do. But to let someone in on a more intimate level and to strike past the barriers of fear, rejection, second-guessing, etc., well that’s escaped me at this point. Now you might think it strange that I’d post this, but let’s be real: if you’re reading this, you actually know me. And what the hell – why not know something about my being that’s beyond the surface? We’re not completely the happy face that you see at the party; we’re something much deeper, much more obscure and difficult to locate. Hell at times, we can’t even locate ourselves. It’s neither a good nor bad thing, but we are who we are. So why not be honest and open about it from time to time, ey?. This realization hit me on the head like…well, another bad metaphor…and that’s pretty damn hard. As for the circumstances that brought this on, well I'll leave that to myself. I suppose some of it has to do with the fact that I prefer to fly solo, as it is much easier dealing with only oneself. I like to travel light, I guess.

Beer

Alright, now that I’ve posted something rather dour, this calls for a beer. A new wine and spirit shop recently opened up on Stephanie and Warm Springs in Henderson (Total Wine & More), and it’s nothing short of fantastic. I must’ve taken home over a dozen bottles of microbrews and imports during my 5-day stay back home. I particularly fell in love with Anchor Brewing, which you can find here. The older I’ve gotten, the more my relationship with beer has changed. I think the first one I ever tried was something they should serve in prison (PBR or Natural), and as such it took me a long time to come around to the idea of beer being something more than just a drink for moronic college twats to pound down while engaging in stupid horseplay, or hipster teenagers trying to feel cool by downing a few (you’re all doing it wrong, kids!). There is so much more to beer than that kind of crap; beer is spiritual, which is why you don’t get trashed or stupid on it. We’ve got some of the best microbrews in the United States that I think could easily compete with the rest of the world. When a pale ale hits your pallet and releases a (generally) bittersweet explosion of taste, there’s nothing that can make the moment better…unless Budweiser or Hite suddenly went under.

And that would be something to drink to.

"Kitty, Lumpia, and Whiskey.

What Is the True Meaning of Christmas?; or “Lumpia and Whiskey”

Earlier this evening, I had the great pleasure of joining some friends for a Christmas party at their church in Suwon. Although the service wasn’t exactly my brand, it was good fun all the same. There were quite a few people there from various backgrounds – Korean, Filipino, Sri Lankan, Anglo, etc. It’s an awesome thing to have such diversity for a number of reasons, but chief among them is that its proof in the pudding that religion has as much of a power to unite people as it does to divide them. And when such peoples are united, they are bound to create a whole hell of a lot of good food. I am now 15,000+lbs. heavier due to the assault on the Filipino table that I made. Adobo, lumpia, dulce leche, that thing with bay leaves, etc. all went down for the count. We all then later participated in a White Elephant exchange, and yours truly won a bottle of whiskey. Combined with the recent stash of beer I picked up while on base, this is going to be a very Merry Christmas.

Who Loves Kitty?

We all do; and if you don’t, you will after watching this video. 1:17 is how I feel at the moment; watch the precious fat kitty waddle about at 5:09.

Political Processes Can Frustrate and Unnerve; or “Barack Obama Needs to Borrow a Pair”

I’ve been taking a break from keeping up to date on politics and current events lately, much to the dismay of the entire world (which certainly depends on my keen insight and understanding of what’s going as a bellwether). One thing that has peaked my interest, however, has been the recent deal between President Obama and Congressional Republicans on extending tax cuts (for everyone, including income earners of over $250K/yr) and unemployment insurance. This follows a threat from Republicans to hold up all pending legislation – including the repeal of Don’t Ask Don’t Tell and extension of unemployment benefits – unless tax cuts were extended for top income earners. Instead of holding fast and HAMMERING THE HELL out of his Republican counterparts, Obama caved in to a deal that does nothing to help the economy and extends our deficits.

The political battle itself wouldn’t have been that difficult. Democrats WANTED to permanently extend the Bush tax cuts for most income earners, letting only the cuts for very high income earners ($250K+) expire. Yet you’ve got 41 Republicans who would hold up extending unemployment benefits for people who can’t find work just so they can extend billions in tax benefits to the rich. Instead of taking to the airwaves and using the Power of the Pulpit, Obama and his team caved. At least one guy has the cajones to call them on it.

One wonders what it would be like to have a liberal progressive president who actually fought for what he or she believed in; at least someone supposedly more moderate like Hillary Clinton would know how to go to the mattresses every once in awhile.

This is Insane

I mean seriously. That much hair gel and house trance music make my drug-free bloodstream SCREAM for cocaine.

Sickness, Zombies, and Video Games; or "Someone Throw Me Into a Swimming Pool of Antibiotics...or a Giant Margarita"

It’s been five days since I contracted some form of viral plague. I’m not entirely certain what it is, as my doctor (the veritable Dr. Choi; quiet man, comfy slippers) initially said I had a strain of the flu, but then later changed the prognosis to a larynx/throat/lung infection. It’s entirely possible it could be an early form of pneumonia as well. On Friday, it got so bad that the doctor had to put me on a bed and run an IV through my arm for a couple of hours. I’ve never had that before; I guess you could say it was very exciting, but I’m in no mood to be very excited. I just want my damn health back, and the desire to breathe without simultaneously praying for death. As a consequence of my ailment, I’ve been confined to my shoebox for the next two days, having already spent the weekend here already. Some good has come out of this, though. It turns out that one of my co-teachers whipped up the absolute BEST homemade chicken noodle soup I’ve ever had in my life. It was like a wet dream with chicken broth…and penne pasta.

A Shot Seen Around the …Doctor’s Lobby

So after I’m done visiting with Dr. Slippers, I’m escorted into an adjacent waiting room by the nurse who would inject me with a delightful needle filled with…I don’t know, anti-sick shit. Anyway, she gestures to me to drop my pants, as she would storm the Bastille from behind; I comply, not caring one bit that she had to look at my wrinkly pathetic patooty (the thing is flatter than Sarah Palin’s view of planet Earth). She popped it in, pulled out, and gave me a little square wipe to press the spot so the minimal bleeding would quickly dissipate. Just as she handed off the wipe, the nurse flung open the door and walked out without closing it behind her. As I turned around to look for her, I saw a lobby filled with Korean women (and their children) staring at my bare and bony ass. Some were shocked, others were amused, and at least one turned away (presumably in horror?). I rushed to pull up my jeans, but by then the damage had been done.

Zombies in America

I was talking with a friend of mine a few weeks ago on the state of affairs of American/Western society. He had an interesting commentary on how things are at the moment: we’re a nation of zombies. In the last 10 or so years, there’s been a major rebirth of zombie- related films (Day of the Dead, Dawn of the Dead, Shaun of the Dead, ZombieLand), and he posited that it was no coincidence. We are also hooked into some sort of corporatized Stockholm Syndrome, he argued, where we have allowed ourselves to become a captive audience to the forces that be – our government, our companies, etc. At first, I thought he was being a bit far fetched in his ideas. But the more I think about it, the more I agree. The first example that I can think of in this new millennium is the 2000 election debacle, in which the man that won the election – in both Florida and nationally – did not actually become president. There were no real mass protests or demonstrations at the blatant punch in the face of democracy, or at the abortion of a Supreme Court decision that gave us George W. Bush as President. But throw in the Iraq War (no reason to go, and it was a popularly-support war), declining wages, loss of jobs, economic stagflation for most people coupled with prosperity for the upper crust of society over the last ten years, and the near-destruction of the economy due to greedy bastards on Wall Street, and what should you have? Mass public participation in economic, political, and social fourms. People should be fighting for their livelihoods and right to live in dignity; instead, it seems we’ve castrated ourselves by believing in the false narratives of a corrupt oligarchic political-economic system. Most people understand that the heads of Pfizer, Bank of America, Delta Airlines, virtually every Wall Street financial firm, etc. don’t give a rats ass about them, but we’re all too comatose to do anything about it. The fact that there weren’t mass arrests in the 10005 zip code after the meltdown is really disheartening.

Congress isn’t much better, as a bunch of Republican deuchbags – one Sen. McFartyPants is particularly deuchy for his sanity-bankrupt stance on DADT – are currently holding up all legislation until we extend taxcuts for income earners of over $250,000,  while at the same time balking at extending unemployment benefits during the worst economic period in the history of ever (except the Great Depression; that was mad depressing). Whose interests do you think they really have in mind? Further, we’ve been talking about the supposed insolvency of Social Security so much that you’d think it’s going to break down tomorrow; it’s not. It’s one of the greatest scams that’s being hoodwinked over people. A few adjustments in the system makes it solvent; one of the biggest adjustments would be to eliminate the ceiling at which payroll taxes are deducted, currently at $108K/yr.

So our economic and political systems are largely ineffective (and arguably hostile) to the needs and wellbeing of most Americans, instead serving the interests of a few at the expense of everyone else. But what of our societal pursuits? What are we doing in the realm of music, art, film, culture, that kind of shit, etc. that’s advancing the cause of our common humanity? Perhaps this donut pizza, accompanied by awful beer, can lead us to some answers.

We’re Doomed.

On the Lighter Side…

Click here for hilarity.

Losing Interest in Things That Were Once Relevant; or “Flight Simulator Bores the Hell Out of Me”

I spend a fair amount of my free time playing various video games, mostly Flight Simulator and a modified computer version of Madden (programmed with 2010 rosters and bother bells/whistles). For a long time, I took a sense of enjoyment in these games and others. But lately, it seems that playing those games serves no purpose other than to fry my brain cells; besides, the 49ers can only win so many consecutive SuperBowls before I realize I’m playing through a game-world that could never see its replication in real life (they’d be lucky to hit 8-8 this season, like every other season). I guess this is part of growing up, losing interest in things that once peaked your imagination and enjoyment. Aviation in general seems to be a losing love for me, something I never thought would happen. Yet the industry has been severely tattered in recent years, with labor relations going to hell, airlines merging left and right, and new aircraft concepts looking like sterile mule-child experiments. I’ve taken a greater interest in reading lately, mostly in terms of news and blogs. I didn’t follow current events all that extensively up until last June, when I first arrived in Korea. I guess mindless forms of entertainment – be they videogames, endless drinking binges, voting Republican, etc. –  can serve a purpose of escapism that itself needs to be escaped from.

In some ways, I’m starting to think that my gauntlet to Korea was rooted in a not-yet-understood form of escapism. I can’t readily explain it now, so maybe I’ll do so in the future. But suffice it to say, I don’t think taking a year or two – or ten or twelve, in the case of some veteran teachers that I’ve met – really helps you to “find yourself”, whatever the hell that means. I think I know more about myself now NOT because I am in another place, but because I am away from home…I hope that makes some sense, even though I’m not fully elaborating. Now all this being said, I’d like the record to show that my experience in Korea has been mostly great. Except for being sick this week. And the awful awful beer that permeates this binge-drinking society.

Confessions to Make

A. I've been at war with correct grammar and usage of various things like commas, periods, and ellipses. But I've never gotten anything lower than an A- on a major paper, so kiss my grits.

B. I’ve been listening to 1990s boy band music a lot lately. I feel dirty and wrong. 

Home; or "God I hate Korean Beer"

First, I’d like to apologize for taking a month (a whole damn month!) without keeping the blog contraption up to date. Between things happening in my life here, as well as some family matters taking precedent back home, I haven’t had a great deal of time to collect my thought and put them onto paper…err “electronic” paper. So here’s what I have for this entry.

North Korea

I’ve received a number of comments and messages on my Facebook account wondering where I am and if I am safe, as a result of recent hostilities flaring up from Kim Jong Krazy and his regime of thugs. I’m doing just fine here in Korea, safe and sound, enjoying a pineapple soju cocktail to end the day. It’s kind of interesting to see Western media accounts of the situation on the peninsula, and then contrast them to what Korean media are saying. It seems CNN, BBC, etc. all play up the drama on the peninsula. (WARNING: stereotyping set to occur!) Koreans are naturally dramatic people, and they tend to have flair in their personalities (somewhat in contrast to it being a more communal society, instead of individualistic); consequently, it so shows up in their actions. It makes them that much more fun to be around, and (STEREOTYPE AGAIN) generally speaking, they are amongst the kindest people on Earth I’ve encountered…Kim Jog Jackass notwithstanding. All this said, there just isn’t that much concern in South Korea about the recent shelling. True, the currency market here fluctuated – as it did across Asia. But it always does that. In the long-term, I think most people will write this off the Northern Regime desperately looking for some attention like it was a ginger kid. So don’t worry about me, kiddies, I’m doing just fine. But thank you all the same for the concern. It does me well to know that I am cared for J. Now onto the rest of my bullshit!

State of American Politics

I haven’t been paying much mind to what’s going on back home since the end of the elections; I need a break from it, and it seems that I lost at least one or two friends due to some online spats. Politics shouldn’t divide people in such ways, but I guess it did. I guess I need to still learn how to say what I want to say in a way that does not make me a condescending jackass with a  know-it-all-complex. I really don’t have one of those, I’m just very tall. In fact, I’m often very unsure of myself. And that’s true even in my ideology from time to time.

I was very heartened to see Sen. Harry Reid get re-elected; even more heartened to see that Sharron Angle wasn’t elected. With the election out of the way, I do hope she’ll return to private life and be very successful in whatever avenue she chooses to pursue…as long as it doesn’t involve an officeholder position. For all of her ludicrous and possibly insane policy positions, she never seemed to be disingenuous (except when trying to explain her social security position) or at all a bad-hearted person. As such, she deserves as much joy in life as anyone else.

Perhaps Mr. Obama will have learned some very important lessons from earlier this month. True, he could’ve done a MUCH better job at being on message and attacking the politics of policy in a more coherent and effective way. But think about this: 14 million young people who voted for Barack Obama in 2008 sat this election out. Nationally, the Republicans bested the Democrats by 5 million votes. Had we gotten just half of those kids out to vote, Congress would’ve stayed Democratic and the President would have a better chance at getting his legislation through. Instead, we get gridlock for the next two years. So let’s see what happens; hell, I’ll be a world away anyway.

State of Korean Beer

Before coming to Korea, I sampled a few bottles of Hite I was able to find back home in the Asian marts in Las Vegas. I thought it was a pretty decent brew, partly excited by the fact that I had enjoyed the mainstay of Korean lagers. Upon landing in Korea, however, that excitement evaporated into a bewildering sense of disillusionment. Maybe the bottling standards are different in the US, or maybe I was trying to psychologically hype myself up, but it’s piss. poor. beer. There is just no way of getting around that. Cass is even worse (can’t even digest the stuff without dying a little inside), and OB is undistinguishable. I have been able to find a few decent imports here, most notably San Miguel’s Dark Lager (which I find emblematic of Filipinos in general…in a word, FANTASTIC!) and, to a lesser extent, Singha. I don’t care to pay $2 a bottle for either, though. Needless to say, my beer consumption has been dramatically curtailed since living in the Land of the Morning Hangover. Enjoy it now, Mr. Liver; Kitty will be back Stateside soon enough…

6 Month Anniversary

This Friday will mark my 6 month anniversary of living in Korea. I’ve got very VERY mixed feelings about it, the negatives of which are not at all reflective of this country or the people that reside in it; quite the contrary, they mark the positives very well. I do like Korea - except it’s alcohol – that’s really my only complaint about living here, though for someone who likes a good lager and a great stout it’s a valid complaint nonetheless. The people are generally kind, whether or not they are nice. The community of expats here too is pretty awesome, as I’ve made some great friends here from all over (though I have to admit, my core contingent of people are mostly from the USA…but I’ve got Southerners in that mix! That’s exotic!).

I miss home, though. I really do. America is a great country. It’s got its faults to be sure, and it can frustrate the hell out of you at times. But it’s a wonderful place to call home. If you don’t believe me, go to San Francisco and find Scoma’s off one of the piers, sink your teeth into a CrabCake sandwich, and tell me there is no God. I DEFY you! Or go the Pacific Northwest and find yourself in awe, inspired by its own graceful beauty. Or go to Las Vegas and…alright, have a couple beers and pray you hit the jackpot. But while there, hit up the fabulous restaurants that abound.

I guess what I’m saying is that you can take the boy out of America, but you cannot take the America out of the boy. There’s a lot of debate and rancor out there about what it “means to be American”, as if there’s one set definition out there. Critics of America would point to Bud Light, NASCAR, the Republican Party, and televangelists as being seminal to the American experience; to be sure, they’re also full of shit. Everyone’s America is different, and that’s what makes those experiences uniquely American – it is as vastly different for everyone as they are from each other, yet at the same time E Pluribus Unum. It’s not the alcohol (by now a full bottle of soju) talking, but I really do believe in America - in what it is, and what it can become. After all, it’s the country the put a man on the moon, that put a skinny black kid from a poor background with a father from Kenya into the presidency, and that deep fried the twinkie into perfection. And for me, being an American means being a citizen of the world, knowing full well that entertaining any idea of isolationism is ultimately self-defeating.

I also miss my friends and family very deeply. I’ve grown up a lot the last few months in the sense that I know more now about what is really important to a man: family, faith (should he have it, and not knocking anyone who doesn't - just as I hope they don't knock me), and country. I know that sounds so fu$^ing cliché, so forgive me on that part. But it is true. Those are the things that I value and hold dear, even if I haven’t always stood by them perfectly (though I’ve never renounced my citizenship, my God, or my family, so I can’t be all that bad).

As to whether I will be staying on for another year, I’m on the fence. The job situation back home is still frightful, and I’d like to come back home with a few $ in the bank as well. I'm not certain that my time here is up. I mean there are at least 50 varieties of kimchi that I’ve yet to digest. On the other hand, there are things to be done back home, even if I'm not sure where my future direction lies. And something seemingly eery at the moment is that I'm teaching a chapter to my 6th graders entitled "It's Time to Go Home". Kind of strange to be contemplating such things while teaching that. If given the chance and circumstances to get back…I don’t know. But I do know that when I go home, it will be to America.

Conservatism and Sharron Angle; or “Don’t Read This if You Think My Blowhard Liberal Rantings Will Offend You (though hopefully they’ll make you laugh)”

Conservatism and Sharron Angle; or “Don’t Read This if You Think My Blowhard Liberal Rantings Will Offend You (though hopefully they’ll make you laugh)”

I know some people get annoyed when I make so many political postings on Facebook, but I just can’t help it. It’s election season, we’ve got a lot of serious issues to contend with, and a lot of unserious candidates running for office. As soon as the election is over, I promise the posts will stop. Until then, the rants continue.

The 2010 election cycle has to be one of the most disturbing to witness since the 1950s saw us through McCarthyism, as a number of uninformed and seriously misguided – sometimes even batshit crazy – candidates are running for office. Since you all know my political viewpoints (to the left!), I think you know who I’m talking about: Rand Paul, Christine O’Donnell, Ken Buck, Carl Paladino, Joe Miller, and my state’s very own Sharron Angle. It’s bad enough that we live in a political climate where an entertainer with no real-world experience outside of talk radio like Rush Limbaugh is heralded by many as an articulate political pundit, but he’s not running for office; these wing-nuts are, and they could very well end up representing YOU in Washington D.C.

I’m not an unbiased person, to be sure. I’m pretty liberal in my political viewpoints, but that doesn’t mean that I associate conservatism with idiocy or lunacy. If anything, conservatism is a philosophy that advocates keeping things the way they are as much as possible; experimenting with new ideas can sometimes be hazardous to a people and its government. I get that, and to various extents I’m a conservative person in my own life. The budget deficits that we’re facing right now call for an overhaul of the way budgets are made in Washington, and that most certainly means both spending cuts (especially in the bloated Dept. of Defense budget, arguably the most inefficient government bureaucracy) and tax increases. I would think that most conservatives realize that.

 But the list of people I just mentioned above are not conservatives, and they probably couldn’t define the term beyond anything but the normal platitudes you hear from them: limited government, less spending, less taxes, blah blah blah, etc. They have no idea that protecting the environment and preserving our nature’s heritage is a fundamentally conservative idea; they don’t understand that allowing gays and lesbians the right to marry is a conservative proposal, because it acts as a civilizing force for gays and lesbians -after all, aren’t the values of marriage that we want to preserve those of love, monogamy, and commitment?; they don’t understand that the separation of church and state is inherently a conservative principle (in addition to a constitutional one), as they both function better when they don’t have undue influences on the other; and they don’t understand that military adventurism is most certainly not a conservative value, as our republic was never intended nor designed to be an empire. Instead, their “conservative ideology” is anything but conservative. They seek to return the United States to the social model of the 1950s and the economic model of the 1900s. They abhor GLBT rights, they could give a damn about economic prosperity for all socioeconomic classes, and it wouldn’t surprise me if they believe Jesus is telling them to invade Cuba (or possibly Pennsylvania). They’re not conservatives, they’re just insane.

Sharron Angle

Speaking of insane, this little Teapot could quite possibly be the next United States Senator from Nevada. Polling is showing the race to be very tight, with Angle leading in 2 of the last 3 polls (but not by much). I see this race as a referendum not necessarily on Harry Reid, but rather on the state of democracy in the United States. There is a great deal of dislike towards Harry Reid, which I don’t personally understand. I’m not crazy about the guy, but he hasn’t done anything that warrants the kind of hostile reaction garnered from the Right. He’s the Senate Majority Leader, which means he’s the face of the Democratic Party in the Senate, which means he automatically becomes a pretty unpopular fellow. As soon as he took that mantle in 2007, he had to know that his re-election in 2010 would be tough because Senate leaders on both sides have tough re-election bids (Mitch McConnell had a close call in ’08, Tom Daschle lost his seat in 2004, and plenty of others declined to run again after leading their respective parties). That’s the price of leadership.

Even with all the angst towards Reid, the fact that the Republicans in Nevada nominated someone who is clearly in over head shows just how far our democratic capacities have dropped. Instead of nominating the best and the brightest, we’ve now got a match-up between an unpopular incumbent and Looney Tunes. And if you think I’m being hyperbolic in calling Sharron Angle crazy, or unqualified, or ill-tempered, or - oh hell, let’s go through the list right now and get it out of the way: crazy, lunatic, nuts, batshit crazy, scary, laughable, idiotic, repugnant, batshit crazy again, delusional, insane, or a crayon box short of a crayon box –, it’s worth repeating a great deal of what Mrs. Angle has said on the campaign trail thus far. Some of these clips and stories are real treasures:

1.       The media should ask questions that only candidates want to answer, and to report the news they want it to be reported..

2.       Social Security should ultimately be phased out, instead of fixed; another link here.

3.       High school football team uniforms that are all-black are satanic and “thoroughly evil”.

4.       She’ll peddle influence to other candidates if they drop out of the Senate race

5.       Not only is there is no separation of church and state, but religion should guide public policy.

6.       God wants her to become a Senator (this one I believe if the End of Days are actually upon us…also, this is on Pat Robertson’s TV show. Crazy reporting crazy.) Also, here’s another.

7.       Muslims are invading Michigan and Texas.

8.       Entitlements like unemployment insurance, social security, and Medicare have spoiled people.

9.       Rape and incest are not valid reasons to obtain an abortion…and I think she alludes to “God’s plan” having a part in such things…? Someone please clear that one up .

10.   Doesn’t discern the difference between gay marriage and repealing Don’t Ask Don’t Tell, and thinks that voters who approved gay marriage bans favor DADT (when most people don’t).

11.   Thinks Hispanics look Asian.

12.   Thinks she’s an Asian. (same video as above, towards the very end)

In a nutshell, she’s nuts. And voting for her makes you nutty. I’m not saying that she’s a bad person, or lacks character; don’t mistake this for a “character attack”. I’m not questioning whether she’s a good or person, BUT I am saying that she’s quite possibly certifiable. She has displayed a complete and utter lack of judgment and temperament, and in no way has a mentality that befits a position as important in a democracy as the one that she’s currently seeking (you can be a very pleasant and moral person and still be insane. I know this from being myself). I know a lot of people don’t like Harry Reid, for whatever reason. But how in good conscience can you vote for or support this candidate? I hate the idea of voting for someone because you’re voting against the other candidate, but that’s what this race has boiled down to. If you have sanity, if you have rationality, if you have any respect for what representative democracy means, you WON’T vote for Sharron Angle. Hell, we’d be better with “None of the Above” taking a plurality of votes instead of her. At least a vacant seat wouldn’t be occupied by someone creaming inarticulate ramblings from the Senate floor; it’s bad enough that I’m doing that from this blog!

 If you’re voting for her because she’ll be a reliable vote for the Republicans and will take a swipe at the Dems by ousting Reid and NOT because you think she’d make a good senator (does anyone believe that?), you are putting your party before your country. To my conservative Republican friends, you know she’d be a bad senator – many of you have gone so far as to explicitly tell me that, and that you’re voting for her only to depose Harry Reid. It’s an insult to the voters of Nevada that she became their nominee for US Senate. Likewise, it’ll be an insult to democracy if we vote her in on Nov. 2^nd.

Slavery, Agnosticism, The Future, and a Drinking Song

The Mind is a Slave unto Itself

(Warning: this particular section of today’s blogpost is exceedingly long, and you may wish to avoid it if you’re not keen on religion or related subjects)

In the last few weeks – indeed, the last few months – I’ve been reflecting a great deal on the role of religion in my life. A particular spark was lit when I was browsing The Economist’s website a few days ago (link here). On the debate page, there was a discussion on whether or not religion was ultimately a force of good in the world. I read through the pros and cons, and didn’t feel any more or less obliged to one particular direction more than the other after reading it. I’ve held for a long time that I believe religion has, on the whole, been a net positive for mankind. It’s inspired men and women to do great things, alleviate human suffering, and brings forth a sense of community that’s integral to real human needs. At the same time, it’s also been used as a weapon (and oftentimes a cheap excuse) to do what mankind is so prone to – killing itself. Then, for whatever reason, I was reading something involving the role of Christianity in supporting and opposing the institution of slavery throughout human history. Reading through the material, a profound question entered into my mind like no other had before – why did Jesus Christ not condemn the institution of slavery?

Before I expand on that question, let me explain its context and importance. In just about any Christian faith (except for Unitarianism, to my knowledge), Jesus Christ is revered as being divine and of God; I know this is common knowledge to just about everyone under the sun, but it’s worth contemplating for just a second: Christ was God here on earth, in human form (to Christians). At the time that He came down to earth for His divine purpose, the corrupt and reprehensible practice of slavery was a completely institutionalized social, political, and economic norm; it permeated throughout society. It was so widespread and acknowledged that the Old Testament is rife with rules and regulations about the treatment and conditions of slaves. BUT it’s never condemned. I never gave it more than a passing thought, because it had been explained away as just a context for the times (that and that slavery back then was markedly different in its practice from what most Americans think of slavery to be, re: Antebellum South). It was not a great theological question that I ever wrestled with. And then all of the sudden it hits me like a fat kid hits a chocolate bar, or like my head hits a stop sign in Korea.

So there’s the question: Why didn’t Jesus Christ condemn the practice and institution of slavery. I mean, He’s God, right? Isn’t He supposed to be in the business of condemning things that elicit and perpetuate human suffering? Murder, lying, stealing, coveting, shrimp cocktails, etc. all get some mention in either the Old or the New as being an offensive, but never the forced submission of one man or woman to another. Jesus Himself taught parables through the servant-master relationship to describe the man-God relationship, though “servant” most always meant “slave”. And while I’d have no problem with suggesting that every person belongs to God, the idea that one man can be owned – literally, in every sense – by another is gravely appalling and morally unjust. We know that today. Although the practice still occurs in various corners of the world, the human race has since acknowledged its practice to be a crime against humanity. Why didn’t Christ?

To hear the apologetics, you’d get various answers. The Catholic answers from New Advent site (here) comment mostly on the role of the early Church and the practice. Their contention is that had the Church opposed slavery, society itself could’ve very well crumbled under the social and economic upheaval that would’ve ensued had the practice been condemned. Others would argue that had Christians opposed slavery from the get-go, the religion would have died in its infancy (though one would think that it would spread quickly amongst slave populations).

I have two responses to this. First, yes it probably would’ve caused a great deal of social consternation; removing an institutional feature that was woven into the fabric of life at that time would certainly rile things up. But so what? Didn’t Jesus come here to cause “upheavals”? After all, the Endgame in Christianity is one big upheaval. Further, should not all moral injustices be opposed and condemned? Since when is it a tenet of any religion to merely oppose what’s unpopular? Such things are easy.

There is a big seeming contradiction here, based on the premise that Jesus was divine, that God WOULD NOT condemn something that was heinously evil, slavery. This is itself premised on the conclusion that slavery is evil, which I think any rational person would concur with. If Jesus was truly divine and morally infallible, surely He would’ve said something on the matter. On the other hand, if Jesus was simply a man and operated within the context of the times as such, then His response (or lack thereof) towards slavery is understandable. BUT there’s where the kicker is: that conclusion supposes that Jesus was not divine, thereby causing this current crisis of faith.

Edna’s Response

Consulting various sites and sources, I hadn’t been able to find any worthwhile reconciliation of the two. Most of what I read suggested that slavery was simply a fact of life at the time (and for thousands of years after); a certain attitude of “c’est la vie” seems to permeate a lot of Christian thought on the topic, coupled with the admonition that the Christian churches eventually opposed the institutions.

I then spoke with the other native English teacher at my school, Edna, who is among the wisest souls I’ve ever encountered (and one of the best cooks, for that matter). We discussed the issue for a good half hour, and she seemed a bit stumped herself. So she got back to me a little later in an email, trying to reconcile all these things. From Edna:

“ Why did Jesus not openly condemn slavery---that it is wrong and therefore must be stopped? The same way that He did not openly condemn other issues at the time. Come to think of it, do you think that would be a better strategy? Would that reach the heart? Or would that just be the talk and not the walk? Remember, Jesus is concerned after our hearts.

That had happened two thousand years ago---and yet look at His very words ----they still ring in our ears; and His very acts wrench our hearts.”

That’s actually the best response I’ve thought about since I asked the question. The question is reframed from a societal point of view into an individual one. Oftentimes, we lose sight of religion being a personal thing – it is indeed personal. Insofar as a Christian’s relationship with Christ is concerned, it is intensely personal. Community matters a great deal, of that there can be no doubt; that’s why we have the Mass, why we go to services, and why we say we’re interconnected when we talk about the Body of Christ. BUT you can’t forget the personal aspect to all this. At its very core, the Christian faith is one of a “personal relationship”, as its said, with Jesus Christ. To the skeptic/agnostic/doubter/etc., that does mean talking to what many people perceive as some magic man in the sky; it can make you look crazy to many others, but that’s what it is.

So the question is reframed from a societal one (e.g the role of slavery in society) to an individual one – e.g how does slavery affect the individual person, both slave and non-slave? That becomes a more muddled area of concern, because slavery in antiquity isn’t entirely relatable to slavery in the Antebellum South; I think people in antiquity had greater worries of war and food than we do today, and as such the role of slavery as a debatable issue back then did not take precedence. Consequently, speaking of it and attacking it would presumably – and this is an assumption, something to take on faith (I suppose) – somehow prevent the Gospel from having its effect on the individual heart. And whenever Christ – or, for that matter St. Paul in his letters to various audiences – did have any mention or say about slaves/servants, it always emphasized the need to treat each other as brothers and sisters, as family. If these people at the time had such a difficult time of relating to each other in that simple way, it is entirely possible that a drumbeat about servitude might not be entirely effective.

 And all we have of Christ’s teachings seem fully focused on individual – not societal – remedies. The rich are admonished to give up their possessions and take their treasures in heaven, but He doesn’t say anything about taxing them. We’re talking about a societal problem framed in a societal context, when Christ’s approach to just about everything is individual. The Church is for the societal, then, and its role in either supporting or condemning slavery is what becomes critical.

I’m sure I have some more thoughts on the matter, but right now I seem to be at something of an impasse. It’s a more difficult question to grapple with.

Of course, I could always take the easy road and throw my hands up in the air, become an agnostic, and simply be content to live a life of good deeds and kimchi. But I’m not giving up just yet. There are still deeper meanings to understand and headaches to overcome.

Agnosticism as the most reasonable position; or “I am not a reasonable person”

I think the agnostic point of view is easily the most reasonable and rational, since it doesn’t presume to know whether or not there is a God; or if there is a God, what the qualities of that deity are. And quite frankly, none of us can prove one way or the other whether God exists. By the same token, I can’t prove that a pink elephant is on the roof of my school at the moment. It’s exceedingly unlikely, but unless I physically get up on the roof and confirm there is no pink elephant, the possibility of it being there still exists. It’s kind of silly to make an apples to apples comparison using the two – God and a pink elephant (would God make a pink elephant) – but there’s some logic behind it.

That being said, I find it difficult in adopting a point of view that stipulates the universe as we know it is the result of a random sequence of events that just somehow happened. Reality, as I perceive it, takes into account of coincidences and the laws of randomness; but I don’t trust coincidence, and I don’t trust randomness. Everything we see and experience on earth has some purpose behind it, most notably our own evolution over millions of years (the purpose being to adapt and survive in our environment…which hopefully we evolve the ability to breathe CO2 and live in 150*F weather, at the rate we’re going). And that human perception – that self-awareness – is a key trait we hold in trying to answer the big questions.

That being said, I could use a break from the big questions. As you can see, they’re driving me mad.

Teaching in the Middle East

I’ve got until June 2011 before my contract in Korea is up, and I’m dithering as to what my next move will be. Most likely, I’ll resign and stay another year here – it’s the most practical and logical decision for me, as I’ll have my debt incurred from college paid (not to mention have a few extra dollars in the bank). But that’s only two years down the road. The question of what after comes up, and my answer can be one of many different paths. I could finish up my M.Ed at UNLV, and that’d be the most likely option; I worked for a year on that thing, and it wouldn’t seem right leaving business unfinished – not to mention the debt that I owe to my colleagues and friends from the C&I dept. there. Once that’s completed, though, I don’t know where things will stand.

I could possibly take the LSATs and enter law school, but then I face two harrowing prospects: a.) a life in a career that I find unfulfilling and economically challenging (law school debt + bad job prospects) and b.) listening to my mother say “I told you so.” for the rest of my adult life. I could also relocate outside of Las Vegas – most desirably to Seattle or the Bay Area – but, again, I don’t know what the prospects would be at the time.

Perhaps the most interesting and intriguing path I could take would to take a job teaching English or Social Studies at an international school in the Middle East. There are numerous schools – particularly in Saudi Arabia and the United Arab Emirates – that pay quite well relative to the cost of living, and offer the chance at exploring another unique culture and its language. Doing so would probably give a few people heart attacks, but it’s something I might want to pursue.

A Lot to Drink About

Between having a crisis of faith, accepting my irrationality, dealing with 1kg of kimchi in my stomach, and wondering about the future, I think Jimmy Buffet has it right.

Tequila? Of course I’ll have some!

Rumors, Grilled Cheese Sandwiches, and the 49ers

Speak Up and Be Heard, but Don’t Believe Everything You Hear (The Downer)

As most of you know, I’m a person who loves to talk (to a fault, no doubt). I don’t know why, but it’s always been in my nature. Conversation is an art-form, and one that you must practice if you wish to excel at it. The problematic thing is that you can often fall into the trap of saying the wrong things or speaking to the wrong people. I’d like to say that such things as rumor-mills and gossip never crossed my path, and that I never engaged in them, but I’d be lying if I did; the odds are the same for you too if we’re being honest with ourselves. They seem to be integral to the human experience, particularly when we’re in our formative years and lack true wisdom and judgment. That being said, I genuinely despise rumors and gossip. Not only because I’ve been subject to them before – mostly miniscule and silly, others rather hurtful – but because the damage they can do to one’s reputation can sometimes be irreparable. Further, rumors and gossip can start amongst one or two people and then their nets can be cast far beyond your social and professional networks. People that you’ve never heard of before have now heard of you, only what they’ve heard is an untruth that you will have to work to discredit.

I think the worst rumor that I’ve dealt with is that I had spread gossip about someone’s personal life when I didn’t. When such things get thrown around to people that you don’t even know, it can sting; when they’re tossed to people that you have admired and deeply respected for a long time, it can feel like someone punched the air out of your lungs. And it can drive you nuts when you don’t know what the full extent of the damage is from something that you didn’t even do; all you did was be present in a conversation that shouldn’t have occurred, and got tainted. Like most situations in life, I suppose that you can take some positives from it. For one, it forces you to check yourself, what your character is, and what your words actually are. For another, it makes you re-evaluate your relationships with other people and gain a better appreciation for the persons that are really your friends. But at the same time, it can also leave you feeling deeply resentful for a awhile. You just have to evaluate, think it over, and then ultimately let it go…and pray that those whom you respected and admired don’t let you go.

Even worse are rumors and gossip that are started at places that are holy to you – literally. For whatever reason, church can be a breeding ground for half-truths and cooked up lies about people. I live 6,000 miles away from the place that I would come to every Sunday to worship, reflect, and get away from it all, yet I’ve heard more than a few different things being spread around about a few different people in just the last two weeks. Without getting into details – it’s all very obnoxious and pathetic – it’s troubling how something so un-Christian happens in a place of Christian worship. I think a lot of it stems from the insecurities that plague us, and the lack of confidence and wherewithal we have about who we are. It’s as if you want to hear other people being torn down and thrown under the bus because that’s exactly how you feel; even if I never said anything about another person, there have been times where I was so down and out that I felt exactly that way. But while we all have hearts that are bruised and battered at some point – sometimes bludgeoned - , that shouldn’t lend itself to the battering bruising of others’.

The Grilled Cheese Crucible and the Shrimp Pizza Redemption (The Upper)

This week, I had the joy of compiling a lesson on different foods and food-related expressions for my 2^nd grade classes. I teach 4 2^nd grade classes full of funny and adorable little kids, so it’s always a little bit of a treat to start my mornings off with them. I found a quick video clip of a cheese expert (what a title) serving up a grilled cheese sandwich, and thought it appropriate to use in my classes. After all, we can watch the video and learn some introductory vocab words: bread, cheese, butter, heart attack, clogged arteries, coronary, etc. So I downloaded the clip and put it into a neat little powerpoint presentation. I thought the kids might get a kick out of it, as anything that’s visually appealing gets wild raucous applause amongst these students. But not with this one…

We get to the video portion, and it starts to play. What followed was the strangest response to a cooking show that I’ve ever seen. Students started to gasp and awe when the bread was buttered and placed into the skillet (why is this so exciting?). Then, the cook flips the sandwich in the air with her spatula, and the kids go wild. “WWWWOOOOOOOOWWWWW!!!!!” was the common scream heard at about 65 decibels. But THEN, the sandwich was finished and thoroughly ready. The cook broke the sandwich in half to reveal the ooey-gooey cheese that would make any American mouth thousands of miles away from his home water. The kids’ reaction, however, was markedly different. There were screams of horror and agony, to the point that you’d think they were frightened and horrified by some ghost. One kid even pointed to the television scream shouting, “NO!” I was absolutely dumbfounded at the tawdry reception the great American grilled cheese sandwich had received.

The next day, I switched the video in favor of a Wolfgang Puck clip in which he made a shrimp pizza. It actually looks like a marvelous creation, though I wondered what response it would elicit from the students. So I put the video into the powerpoint and used new vocab words with identifiable pictures – tomatoes, cheese, shrimp, pizza dough – and let it rip. The kids loved it. Absolutely loved it. As all the toppings were being put onto the dough, there was a collectively mild “ooooooooohhhhh!!!” permeating the room. Wolfgang slid the pizza into the oven, and the kids were a little confused (probably because I didn’t translate the word “oven” was, or something). But once the pizza came out of the oven all fully cooked and at a golden brown, the students started clapping and chanting, “Yaaaaaayyy!”.

Moral of the story – Korean kids are funny. And grilled cheese sandwiches cause riots.

The 2010 San Francisco 49ers

are breaking my heart every week with new and inventive ways of losing. How wonderful it was to watch Nate Clements return a possibly game-winning interception, only to fumble it away because he didn’t go down in time. At 1-3, the 49ers would be only one-game behind in the NFC West. But instead, they sit at 0-4. I keep hearing all is not lost, and all is not lost for the 49ers; after all, they’re in the NFC West. It’s possible that an 8-8 team could end up winning the thing. And I don’t think it’s as bad a division as everyone says. Rather, it’s a terribly mediocre division. The Seahawks, Rams, Cardinals, and 49ers are all teams that have a chance for an 8-8 record; .500 isn’t awful, it’s just mediocre.

Still, I can’t keep waking up at 3am Monday morning to watch a game that will end up making me feel blue all day. If that’s the case, I won’t be the big jolly red man that the kids seem to endeared to.

Milk Delivery, Exciting Vocabulary, and Other Things

Milk Delivery

If you go into my mother’s apartment and use the bathroom (as I hope everyone gets the opportunity to do so…it’s very exciting stuff), you’ll notice that there’s an art picture of two teenage boys delivering jugs of milk in the middle of a monsoon. The picture is entitled “Monsoon Milk Delivery”, which is entirely appropriate given what I just wrote. The photo was taken in Hong Kong, sometime in 1995 I believe.

Every morning, two students (which are in one of my sixth grade classes) are required to deliver little cartons of milk to every teacher in my school. One of the kids that delivers the 우유 looks just like the guy in the photo driving the little cart – either that, or I still can’t tell my Asians apart (which brings up a rather embarrassing time a few weeks ago when I said to a student “Didn’t I just have you in last per..oh wait that wasn’t you.”). Anyways, the kids came in yesterday morning to deliver the milk and placed the cartons in our office refrigerator. I got up and asked them “How are ya, today?” to which they replied “I am funny!” and “Yes.” respectively.

Good show, kids. I see you’re learning a lot from Mr. Foh-ree.

The Things You Tell Friends

I got a text message from a new Korean friend I’ve recently made yesterday that tore me up in awkward laughter. To give you some perspective, I met him at the gym and we started shootin’ the shit about different things – American slang, Korean schooling, the evils of soju, etc. Anyways, here is a transcript of that conversation:

“Hi Ryan. How are you today? ^^”

“Hello, Chun. I am doing great. How about you?”

“I feel good. Now I have a bowel movement without toilet paper.”

“…” “That is very exciting.”

Let’s think about this one, folks. You’re fairly new to English linguistics, and your skills in that regard are rather limited (and part of many Koreans befriending Westerners has to do with improving language skills, which if we’re wise we’d take advantage of the opposite too). You’d think that with limited proficiency, you wouldn’t have the term “bowel movement” in your vocabulary. Apparently, he has another American friend who’s been “helping” him with his English. So now I have the task of re-setting some of his expressions and helping him use new words…as well as to make sure he doesn’t talk about bowel movements in casual conversations.

My Father's...err, Mother's Son

The more time that I’ve spent living on my own, the more I realize just how much I am like my mother. Growing up, I thought the traits that were dominant in my personality were more characteristic of my father. Now, I see it more as a 50/50 between the two. John was outgoing; Phyl has a good command of a crowd (she’d never admit to it). John could be very inattentive. Phyl worries about everything that’s under the sun, and considers everything from every angle (except Sharon Angle). John was hardheaded; Phyl…can be stubborn. Now all this is true of me, I think (though I’ve had some classes that I subbed for go straight to hell…then again one wonders if anyone but Jesus could’ve saved those classes). But the counterbalancing characteristics that give me the red ass are that whereas John was a manipulative and conniving schemer, Phyl would always put the interest of others (see: me) ahead of her own. I’d like to think the same is true of me. I can be as selfish and manipulative as my father, I’m sure. But I certainly hope to high heaven I can display some sense of selflessness as well.

Also, Phyl is very fond of letting television analysts know how stupid they are by reiterating it to the television scream; I’ve counted myself telling at least a few different reporters on CNN World and BBC to “(word) off”. Great fun.

Comparative School Systems

Speaking of CNN World, I caught a segment on Korean unemployment among youth here and how it compares to the rest of the world (basically: screwed). But whereas the problems facing 18-29year olds in the West is fairly cyclical, the problems here are structural. Korean education, for all its greatness (consistently ranking in the Top 5 in Mathematics and Science), is also inherently weak in some very critical respects. If you’ve ever heard of Koreans going to high school from 7am to 11pm while practicing monotonous memorization of formulas and facts, you’d be spot on. It’s a cliché, and it’s a generalization to be sure. But it’s also quite true. There is very little creative agency in the curriculum, which is desperately needed to fully educate and equip a human being. Everyone here wants to work for Samsung or LG, but LG and Samsung recognize that you need creative people who can think independently for them to be successful outfits. Great that you can come up with a computer program with a revolutionary logo rhythm, but can you make it revolutionize?

Much of Korean production seem to me like DuPont – they don’t make things, they make things better. Once the West (or Japan, for that matter) comes up with something, the Koreans will find a way to make it better (Hyundai, Samsung Galaxy, pizza delivery with ACTUAL utensils and clean-up service, etc.). If they make wholesale changes in their educational systems and curriculum, we could find the peninsula becoming the envy of the world.

Compare those systematic problems to American education, where the problem is best described here.

Fresh & Easy.

How I miss that store, with its bulky cheese and chocolate bars the size of my head. Also, it’s name is ripe territory for “That’s what she said!” jokes. Kind of like your mom.

Why Don't We Get Drunk and Screw?

I came across this song by Jimmy Buffett the other day by accident. Says it all, doesn't it?

You’re Building a Mosque at Ground Zero? Are You Crazy?

No, you’re just letting popular mischaracterizations and fear of Muslims drown out what should be your common sense. First, it’s not at Ground Zero – it’s two blocks away. Second, it’s a mosque, a house of God. People go there to worship God, ask for forgiveness of their sense, and seek guidance of what to do in their lives. It’s no different than what I do at church or what a Jew does at synagogue. And if you think Muslim = terrorist, then ask yourselves why you even have the ability to read this rant given that 1 billion people could blow up the world if they wanted to. Third, equating Bin Laden’s Islam with mainstream Islam is the exact same as equating Timothy McVeigh’s Christianity with mainstream Christianity. In its practice, there is no difference – taking commandments of peace, decency, and respect and twisting them into weapons. What is different is that our country isn’t majority-Muslim, and therefore it’s easier to malign and attack that which we don’t understand, and we’ve allowed ourselves to do just that.

This whole firestorm sprung up around May, and this project has been in the works for much longer than that. Hell, Laura Ingraham (see: conservative commentator) said back in December that this thing should be built and it was a non-issue. What changed? Election time. I’m sure there are earnestly-minded people who do have reservations about putting up a mosque 2 blocks away from GZ, but A LOT of this comes from the exploitation on the Right of fear for political purposes. They know there are a lot of us who don't know jack about Islam, and they bait unpopular minorities well. Remember, gays were such an affront to the family that everyone needed a constitutional amendment to prevent them from getting married – because that was the most pressing issue facing Americans in 2004. Why should Muslims not be fair game?

It seems a lot of people are of the mind that “All I need to know about Islam, I learned on 9/11”. And if that’s the case, then we have two big problems, one internal and one external. External in the sense that the Muslim world will think (more so than at the moment) that the West (U.S in particular) is at war with it, and if you thought someone was at war with you, you’d probably respond; internal in the sense that if that attitude is indeed prevalent, then we have a lot of ignorance to deal with. To say that someone can’t share equally in the American experience because he prays to the East and uses Allah in place of G-O-D or Yahweh is very sad, and it’s ultimately un-American. So let’s stop with the pretense and just admit it – America has a problem with Muslims, like it once did with Catholics and Jews. And we need to address it.